Dianda Interviews Heather Mae: The Power And Responsibility of Music

I love when an artist is so rich and clear in their responses. Heather Mae is a lovely human being with so much wisdom, and most of it was born from many heartbreaks. She is a proud lesbian who writes love songs from the perspectives of the LGBTQ community. In our interview, we discuss the struggle for hope and peace when confronting the fear that, perhaps, it is not in your lifetime when you will see your love globally accepted and respected. 

Diandra; What is it about politics, especially in history, that makes it a challenger to love? 

Heather: I identify as a queer musician and person. Until the day our love is considered “normal,” queer love songs are considered radical and apart of a revolution. I look forward to the day when the love songs I wrote for my wife are considered normal and de-stigmatized everywhere in the world. Unfortunately, my love and my ability to be married to my wife is still political. Our love story makes people cry because we are not accepted everywhere.

Diandra: So how do you keep hope and peace in being this forced “revolutionary” because of your love? 

Heather:  (she breathes in) I have my days. I feel lost, unseen, and forgotten, but, at the end of the day, my music writes the narrative for next generations. I want them to be more active and speak to their own truths the same way the songwriters of before pushed me to do so. Right now, even my rights as a woman are being challenged, and there was a time when women are not even allowed to tour on our own because there was a “role” to being a woman. We had to be married to men and have children. There was a time when there was not even a queer artist who was out. I think of Stonewall. So, looking back, I see how I am able to stand here because of them. Though they try to make us think that things have not or cannot change for the better, they have. There was a time when we could not be in the world as we are now, and that gives me hope that, someday, we will be better. 

Diandra: When you look back at the world, why do you feel humanity has always struggled with the theme of love?

Heather: Everyone thinks they know what it is and can define it, but it is everywhere. Wars have begun because of the concept of love and ownership. I think it is undefinable and it just radiates.  There is no one way to love. NO ONE WAY! It is not like in the 80’s LGBTQ community just appeared and came out. We have always been here, and as they get loud, we get louder. I can’t get into the mindset of someone that can go up to someone, like me and my wife, and tell us that our love is wrong. How could you look at our love that is warm and kind and say it is wrong? It baffles me and I would never do that to anyone. 

Diandra: Do you think love and ownership are separate or one in the same? 

Heather: I don’t think you could own love. There was a time in my life when I thought I could (she laughs). Yet, when you find good love, you see there is no owning. It is just supporting and leaning into one another. Sometimes, somebody lifts the other more, but that is only because by supporting the other you are, ultimately, supporting yourself. Again, I can’t imagine telling someone, “I know what love is, and you don’t have it.” (She laughs) 

Diandra; What do you think is your core philosophy in your new LP, Glimmer? 

Heather: I want it to be in the “toolbox” for listeners. I talk a lot about mental health issues, and a lot of my fans’ use my music to get through struggles. They are either a marginalized person or an activist and they feel alone and need to feel empowered and get through. I call my fans my “amazing humans” because they are going through struggles.  I am very open about mental health on this record, and I would say the central theme is, “You are not alone.” No one wants to be the crazy one in a room, but 1 in 4 Americans suffer from mental illness. Add on a marginalized identity, and it is like, “Oh my God!” You have your own personal struggles with “light” and “dark” and then you add on that there are people, literally, trying to take your human rights and tell you that you are wrong or nothing. 

Diandra: Living with Bipolar Disorder, how what are the stigmas music has helped you overcome or heal through? 

Heather: I wrote a record in 2014, and it was a social justice record, which I never thought I would do. I thought social justice music was a hack. Yet, I got nodules on my vocal chords and couldn’t sing. I started talking to people about their stories, and realized that there was something I was not talking about. Whenever, I have an epiphany about myself, I have to investigate it. And it made mad that there was this part of me, my Bipolar Disorder, that I still was ashamed about. I was out there, “Here I am! Social Justice Warrior!” Yet, here was this part of me I did not want to talk about, and my fans look to me to talk about issues. 

I came home, from the tour, and I entered this really bad cycle of trying to find medication for my bipolar disorder. I would get really high or really low and not be able to leave my bed. So, I consulted with my wife, my therapist, and my friends, and I said that I really want to get off my medication and write through what is happening in my mind. And, everybody, signed off on it. I was monitored. I had multiple sessions with my therapist and psychiatrist, but I went into my deepest low. Yet, through that writing process, I realized I have been so scared of being the “crazy one” in a room that I haven’t let myself be outspoken about my own mind. In reality, this is my next thing. Mental illness circulates. It is a thread, and if it took me going through this rough patch to get this record and help others, then great! (she laughs) At the end of the day, I could get a thousand no’s, but I know my fans are alive and I am helping them. 

Diandra: So, how would you define you?

Heather: I am a queer, fat, red-headed songwriter with a really big voice. 

Diandra: How about spiritually? 

Heather: I like to think that if someone introduced me at a party and said, “She is the kindest person I know” that would make feel really warm. 

I LOOOOOOOOOVE that response. Click Here for More information On Heather Mae.